We've been kicking it for awhile and it was really nice. One evening, we went out to dinner, met a few friends at the bar and had some drinks. The night was going well, and we were both feeling comfortable and relaxed from the food, fun, conversation and alcohol. It was getting late and my friend took me back to the house to retrieve my car so I could go home.
I came in the house for a moment and we began to kiss, it was nice, it felt good, but then I wanted to stop. My friends hand went up my shirt, the kissing became more aggressive, and I said, "okay, I'm not ready and I think it's time for me to leave". I was pinned to the wall and couldn't breathe, couldn't move and said "please STOP!, I don't want to", "come on, I'm ready to go!" The reply I heard was, "come on, you know you want me like I want you". My reply, "I really need to go"....."I want you to STOP." I was pushed to the floor, one hand holding both of mine, the other pulling at my underwear. I can't breathe, I'm crying, I'm sweating but I can't scream....I can't speak....I can't move. The next thing I felt is the thrust of my legs with a painful force and then the continous thrust of "my friend" upon me, whispering words that were barely audible, my tears covered my face, my legs spread in pain, my heart racing with fear, my eyes blurred from the sweat.....and then silence. No movement, no words, my breathing even more shallow by the weight and I lay motionless beneath.
I came in the house for a moment and we began to kiss, it was nice, it felt good, but then I wanted to stop. My friends hand went up my shirt, the kissing became more aggressive, and I said, "okay, I'm not ready and I think it's time for me to leave". I was pinned to the wall and couldn't breathe, couldn't move and said "please STOP!, I don't want to", "come on, I'm ready to go!" The reply I heard was, "come on, you know you want me like I want you". My reply, "I really need to go"....."I want you to STOP." I was pushed to the floor, one hand holding both of mine, the other pulling at my underwear. I can't breathe, I'm crying, I'm sweating but I can't scream....I can't speak....I can't move. The next thing I felt is the thrust of my legs with a painful force and then the continous thrust of "my friend" upon me, whispering words that were barely audible, my tears covered my face, my legs spread in pain, my heart racing with fear, my eyes blurred from the sweat.....and then silence. No movement, no words, my breathing even more shallow by the weight and I lay motionless beneath.
What should I do? what do I say? It's over...I guess. The kiss on my forehead, the wiping of my tears and then the words, "baby, what's wrong?" "are you okay?" "baby that was so damn good." "I knew you were hot but wow!!!" The weight is gone. I still didn't know if I was really breathing, I guess I was, but why couldn't I move? I think I was in shock...DID I SAY NO?
Okay, let me play this back in my mind....."my friend" is in the shower, what do I do? I want to run, I'm scared, my heart is racing again, I'm screaming but nothing is coming out!!!! HELLO, HELLO, what just happened? I know we were both drinking and I like "my friend" but I didn't want to? My friend appears at the door again and ask "do you want to take a shower?" "are you okay?" why aren't you saying anything?" ....(in my mind) I have been talking, haven't I? I could have sworn that I said NO!!! NO!!! could "my friend" not hear me then? Maybe my lips were not moving and I was only saying NO!!! in my head, that's it "my friend" couldn't hear me, that's why I.....I....I think I've been raped!!!!
Okay, let me play this back in my mind....."my friend" is in the shower, what do I do? I want to run, I'm scared, my heart is racing again, I'm screaming but nothing is coming out!!!! HELLO, HELLO, what just happened? I know we were both drinking and I like "my friend" but I didn't want to? My friend appears at the door again and ask "do you want to take a shower?" "are you okay?" why aren't you saying anything?" ....(in my mind) I have been talking, haven't I? I could have sworn that I said NO!!! NO!!! could "my friend" not hear me then? Maybe my lips were not moving and I was only saying NO!!! in my head, that's it "my friend" couldn't hear me, that's why I.....I....I think I've been raped!!!!
What would you do if your life changed in an instant?
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